Vampires of Death
by Vampirekitty666
Summary: Evil vampires are attacking Forks! There are only two people up for the job of stopping them...
1. Chapter 1

My name is Imelda van Helisig and I am starting a school in a town called Forks Washington. I'm from Transylvania originally. My dad is the world's greatest vapmire hunter. His name is Achilles and he's killed so far exactly 997 vampires all over the world. We travel the world together searching for vampires hiding among poor and oblivious humans.

My dad got messages from his secret Hunting Society called The Society of Night about vampires distributing terrors in Washington in the USA.

He stepped into my bedroom and announced intensely, "It's time you practiced hunting vampires on your own."

I was in training to be a vampire hunter too. I said, "What must I do?"

"You must go undercover as a student in this school where vampires are allegedly doing terribly monstrous things. I plan to DESTROY them so that nothing remains but their black satanic ashes."

"Ok! I can't wait!" It was an excellent opportunity to finally prove that I could be just as deadily efficient as my dad. We got ready to travel to the USA. We left our comely Transylvanian mansion early in the morning. I said goodbye to my pet cats, Fluffy, Fifi, Winky, Foofy, and Shinji. I was going to miss them so much because they always slept with me at night and listened to me reading out loud the textbooks on vampire hunting techniqes.

Scene TWO:

Forks was an ugly place and it smelled like dead fish, like from the ocean. It was very different from our home, Transylvania, which was beautiful and mountainous with fresh forest air and there were chilly, ivy-covered mideval castles and fortresses and monsteries on narrow cliffsides. We'd cleaned the area of vampires years ago so now the peasants were all safe and they could hunt for warthogs in the forests happily. We were oreos in our native land. They called us the Vanquishers of Evil!

Anyway. We had to be undercover here so I had to try to be American as possibl and so I pulled on blue jeans and a shirt that said "Ambercrumby" and I put my long wavy black hair in a pony tale.

My dad and me moved into the incest room of a local hotel and my dad told me: "Imelda, tomorrow you are going to school. Be careful of the vampires. I have packed a pack for you. Here is holy weater in a Barbie thermos. I put it in a thermos as a disguise. You have to throw the water on the vampires and they will be seriously maimed. Here also is a wooden stake, a hammer, an amulet of protection, and a handful of silver crosses. Do you remember the magical encantation?"

Yes, I said. It's 'az ördög vigye el a gonosz lelkedet'. It's an ancient spell my dad taught me that would keep vampires away from you.

"Very good." My dad said. And then we went to bed.


	2. Chapter 2

Scene THREE:

I went to school. My dad took me. He looked suspieicously around at the students and sniffled the air like Wolverine from XMen and said, "There are vampires here, I can smell the basturds. Be careful they don't disorient you, Imedla!"

"They won't!" I screamed joyfully as I walked through the ornate iron-wrought front gates.

The school was on a rocky hill surrounded by a moat that bubbled and churched maddeningly. The water glowed a greenish light. I was sure the vampires had overtaken the school and all the students were in dangerous situations.

Kids were loitering outside. Some of them looked at me and hissed. Black smoke emulated from their gaping demon-filled maws. They could sense my power of godness.

Inside, the school was dark and smelled like sweat and floor cleaner and it was very ominous. There were torches and spiderwebs on the walls and a homeless person was selling newspapers. The lockers were shaped like coffins and the floor was packed with dirt and jutting out were the bones of small mammals. I was nerbous but I forced myself to stay concentrated on the goal at hand. My first class was gym but I didn't know where it bell rang and soon I was the only one left in the hallway because everybody ran into their rooms. I couldn't help being scared, what if a vampire was luring around?

"What is wrong, little dady?" said a creepy rackety old voice from behind.

I turned sleekly and there was teh school's janitor. He was about 900 years old, his winkly blistered skin sagged off his fibrous bones. He had no hair except two huge coarse tufts over his mole-like eyes. His eyebrows looked scary and his toothless, sulfurous mouth was in a wry frown. He was leaning intimately on his stinky grey mop. For a moment I was too shocked to speak, but then I remembered my dad's words: "Never allow yourself to quiver at sights of horror!" This was horror, all right.

"I am looking for the gymnazium."

The man laughed. "I know what you are really doing here and you won't get your way!"

I gapsed. "What do you mean?"

"You are here to kill my masters!"

How did this man know who I was? Before I could contemplate this more, the man pulled off the mop's head to reviel a sharp metal blade. He jabbed it at me like a ninja and said, "I'm going to poke you through like a piggy and cook you on a skillet! Wretched child of mud!"

I dodged the thrusts and ran to a garbage bin and kicked it at the vampire's servant. He knocked it away wit his weapon and attacked me. I held my pack up to shield mself and the blade slashed my pack in half, everything inside spilling to the floor.

"A ha! I was right! You can't fool 'ol Dick!" the evil janitor rasped in mortal delight. "I'm going to rip open your entrails and bask in the glory of your steaming innards!"

I grabbed the stake that had scattered to the floor and I stabbed the man in the no-no spot. Teh evil janitor keeled over like a dying toad. I swiped his mop and stabbed him in the heart with the pointy end. Immediately, blood poured out of all his orifices and he started writhing with a most poignant violence.

There was sounds coming from the hallway. I heard feet moving and shuffling closer. I knew I had to hide or run because then I would be caught. I picked up all my stuff and ran into the girl's bathroom.

The bathroom was dingy and had naughty graffiti on the walls. I heard sounds from around the stalls. I sneaked up and saw two girls crouching before the waste basket. They were eating something greedily... blood-stained tampons! They were vampires!

I leaped into a stall and acted calm, vampires could sense a person's fear and they find it delectible. I clutched my cross in my pocket. Suddenly... there was a knock on the door and a "Come out, we know you're in there."

I opened the door. There were two girls standing before me. One had short brown hair, the other had long blonde and they were wearing identical black corsets with spiderweb lace. They had purses shaped like bat wings.

"Who are you?" they asked simultaniously in the same evil tone of voice.

"My name is Imelda and I'm a new student. This is my first day." I said trying to be calm. "and what are your names?"

"I am Lice and this is Roalie. We are twins."

They stared at me bloodthirstily. I could smell the sour stench of the mortuary on their bodies. Vampires have a distinct smell, it is sour and cold like an abandoned village's cemetery.

"Well, I have to go now, bye!" I squeeked as I ran out of the bathroom. The janitor's body meantime had been discovered by the principle, Mr. Frankenburger and the furor teachers. I sneaked past them and ran out the front doors. I had important things to tell my dad. I didn't stop running till I reached the hotel.


	3. Chapter 3

Scene FOUR:

"You have disappointed me, Imelda," my dad said, drinking a bottle of red Romanian wine sadly. "You caused great havock at the school. The school janitor was killed and his corpse had to be taken away and the blood had to be wiped off."

"But the man attacked me! He wanted to kill me!" I screamed.

"That may be, but killing him in defence was not the answer. You should have used the amulet. The sight of the magical amulet defends against vampires and their scumbag servants. Instead you used the stake witch was messy and uncalled for. Plus, the man would have been valuable for information. You could have told me about him, and then I woulda captured him into a cage and forced him to dibulge his secrets."

I was sad and I wanted to cry so I ran outta the room.

Scene FIVE:

The next day at school I was more careful. I asked a slavish nerd called Charlie to show me where all teh rooms are. I sat down in history class in the last row in the corner where nobody could see me but I could see them. Then a girl with mousebrain hair tripped into the room. She landed on her face.

"Haha, it's that doofmoose Bella Swans," somebody snicked.

"Shut up, she's hot," said the slavish nerd Charlie who was drooling over his Naruto action figures.

The girl stood up and tramped over to sit next to me. She fell two more times over her feet before she got there.

"Are you ok?" I asked.

The girl glared at me in response. I began to sense that something was not right with her. Perhaps she had been bitten by the vampires and as a result her cordination was off and her mind a blank. I made sure to write a note about her which I would show my dad later.

The history teacher walked in and told everybody to open their books to page 244: it was about the history of Transylvania!

"Who was prince of Transylvania in 1605 and 1606 and led an urppising against the Habsburg monarchy?" mr. Fustbastion asked.

I raised my hand and said, "Stephen Bocskay!"

"Very good, miss --?"

"Imela van Helsnig." I said proudly.

mr Fustbastion smiled and said: "Somebody has been paying attention to their schoolwork."

Just then I felt a rush of wind next to me. Bella Swans had stood up and she zoomed to the door while looking like she had to vomit, but she tripped on a piece of lint and hit her face on the edge of the teacher's desk. She was out cold.

"Wuick, get the nurse!"


	4. Chapter 4

Scene SEVEN:

Bella Swans was carried to the nurse's room by an assortment of fiends. After history was over I decided to fist her. I knocked on the door and slowly crept inside into a dimly lit room with lots of posters on the walls about how to do breast examinations and body parts.

"Who are you?" said the nurse. She looked like a fat milkmaid but she had a pin on her breast that said "MRS. APPLETOWN. NURSE OF THE SCHOOL."

"I'd like to see how Bella Swans is doing please."

"Are you her friend?"

"Of course." i lied mildly.

"This way." The nurse showed me where Bella was laying. She was sleeping and there was a big green bruise on her forehead.

"What a nincompoop. She knocks herself out three times every week," the nurse sighed and then walked away.

I kneeled down beside the bed and without wasting any time I began to strip off Bella's clothes. I was looking for signs of vampires molesting her and sure enough I found deep tooth marks in her armpits, on her neck and collarbone and even on her thighs. Bella suddenly opened her eyes and looked at me.

"What the Hell is this?" she moaned bitchily.

"Oh... nothing."

"Why did you take half my clothes off? Are you a lesbo?"

"No! I was... umm... told by the nurse to take some of your clothes off."

"Really? What a bitch!" Bella stood up shakily, went over to a desk to grab a cup of water but she jabbed her toe into the corner of the bed. She said naughty words. Then she noticed that all her vampire bite marks were visible and she quickly grabbed her clothes, opened the window, and dove through it. She ran to the distant carpark where there was a expensive black convertible with "BatMobile" written over the roof in red letters like blood. Somebody was sitting in it and once Bella tripped into the passenger seat the car drove away madly leavins gwirls of fust behind.

Scene SIX:

When I got home from school I went to a restaurent where my dad was eating a bowl of Hungarian gulyas. I told him about Bela Swans to which he replied: "Verrry good. You have found the lusty whore of the vampires. All we have to do is follow her and when the vampires appear to suck her steamy irresistable blood we surprise them and kill them."

My dad spent the night sharpening his implements of death and making sure that everything was ready. He checked everything: from the batteries of the night vision goggles to the map of Forks where Bella's house was circled in red marker.


	5. Chapter 5

Scene EIGHT:

I went to school the next morning. I searched for Bella Swans but she was not there. I asked some of the guys who had crushed her and they said she was sick at home.

"Interesting." I commented mundanely.

I went to gym class where people were playing basketball. The gym coach ms. Butterfinger told me to get into Team C and then she lunked the ball at me. She whistled and we began to play. There was a boy in the other team who attracted much attention because he was very handsome. His face was white as chalk and he wore a nobleman's suit with rubies as buttons. He also had a black cape with a dragon on it and a golden lace neckbow with a black crystal in the middle emanating evil powers of beyond the dark moon. The girls sighed. I guess he was handsome, but I found his nose to be mushed in too much. He had the kinda nose that loser boxers have after they have been hit in the face 20 times.

But that is beside the point. The boy played incredibly well. He jumped super high and threw the ball so hard once that he knocked out a dissassociating kid. Blood poured out of his nose festively.

"Edward, you bad boy," said the coach, wagging a finger. "How many times have I told you to be careful around the others?"

Edward muttered darkly and tapped his foot (he wore knee-length leather riding boots with heavy metal heels) while the kid was dragged out of the gym to the nurse's. We had to wait for the bloodstains on the floor to be wiped up by the replacement janitor (cause the other evil one I had killed heh). I watched Edward closely. I noticed he was staring at the blood obstrusely. His eyes were wide and he looked like a hypnotised, starving zombie. His meaty pink tongue flickered out like a reptile tasting the air. I gasped because I realised then that he was a vampire! But nobody else seemed to know. I suspected the smart ones were under the vampre's spell, and the stupid ones were just stupid and didn know the truth.

I clutched the cross in my pocket. Edward looked at me suddenly, he must have felt my power. His eyes grew orblike and I felt the unholy demon pounding and squirming within his husk of a body. Edward pointed at me with an ancient yellow fingernail and hissed, displaying his elongated vampire fangs. Then he told the coach he needed to go to the bathroom so he ran away. I was so shocked that I couldn't think. Unfortunately I'm not as calm and plotting as my dad and that's the raison I decided to go after the vampire basturd instead of waiting.

"I gotta go to the bartroom, brb." I shouted at ms. Butterflinger.

I ran to the locker room where my pack of vampire killing tools were. The boys locker room were just across the hall, that's where I planned to go. BUT:

"Hold it right there, you worthless scumchild." said a horrible man's voice behind me. I knew it was the evil vampire, Edward.

"Az ördög vigye el a gonosz lelkedet!" I screamed the encantation.

Edward, who was hanging from the ceiling upsidedown like a giant malvolent bat shielded himself with his arms and he collapsed on to the floor like a heap of wet garbage. I gripped my stake and hammer and tried to stake him in the heart but he moved out of the way. He cackled like a mad scientist.

"You cannot kill me. I am a vampire."

"Watch me! You don't know who you're dealing wit!"

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHA... you will suffer like no one has ever suffered before." Edward said and he dodged my attack with the stake again. "I'm going to rip out your organs and dance as your viscous bodily fluids rain down on me. You are going to die. And den your father too."

I gasped. "How do you know about him?"

"Roalie Lice told me!"

"I should have known."

"Puny mortal, did you not think I have servants and my children of the night constantly at watch? Even the animals, the ancient wolves of Quenya, are under my control. You were very follish to venture into my demon-filled realm. I will relish the death of you and your father and then I, the great Vladimir shall be known as the one who managed to kill of the pestiferous van Helisig family!! No longer will your descendents plague us! We will at last be free to reign over all mortals forever!"

Then he clapped his hands and vampire bats flew in through the window. They screeched and clicked their jaws together rapturously. I hoped they didn't have scabies.

"You can't hurt me." I announced as I held aloft the amulet of protection. It was an ancient green gem encased in silver shapped like a snake. It contained the most powerful protective gypsy spell of all.

"Nooooo!" Edward said, falling to his nees. The bats vibrated, then exploded, and I protected my face from their infectious blood. Edward writhed and clawed at his face with his long fingernails. His pale morbid skin began to bleed black blood (vampires have diffrent color blood). I lurched at him and tried to kill him but he was still very strong. I felt him grab my neck and hiss like a bed of snakes. I kicked him as hard as I could but it didn't help. Black smoke began to evacuate his mouth. I pulled out the cross in my pocket and pushed it deeply into the vampire's forehead. There was a burning smell and the cross glowed like a hot metal.

Edward bucked me off like a crazed bull and I hit a locker. He screamed so loud and high-pitched that all the windows and the coach's glass office shattered inta thousands of miniscule particles. Then he jumped through one of the broken windows and, before he disappeared I heard him recant: "This isn't over!!"


	6. Chapter 6

Scene NINE:

"When will you cease your assnine foolishness?" my dad said, very frustradedly later that day after school. "You make things difficult. We have to put up all the protections we have tonight because the vampires will try to attack us."

I helped him put up the portections, garlic wreaths and holy water was poured around the windows and the door and all the cracks in the floorboards. Den we smoked holy incense and performed a spell that cleansed the area of all bad spirts.

"While you were in school I watched what the whore of the vampires was doing." dad said. "She wasn't sick like you said, she snuck out of the house and ran to the vampire's den. I followed her evasively and siscovered where the creatures are lurking and doin their evil deeds. It is a cave not far from here, in a forest. It's incredibly dangerous and protected by many dangerous beasts under the servitude of hell... including werewolves."

"What are we going to do?" I chattered intensively.

"Tonight, nothing. It's too dangerous, almost night. That's when the vampires are their most powerful. During the day they are easier to kill because the holy sun weakens their miserly bodies."

And that was it. We stayed in the hotel room all night. My dad didn't sleep, he listened to each suspicious noise and stroked his machine gun in his hands.


	7. Chapter 7

Scene TEN:

The next day was Saturday so... no school! My dad and I packed our vampire killing tools into the back of the car we rented and we drove into the woods as long as we could. The path dispeared amid the weeds and thorny borshes. We had to fo on goot. We carried our things in the woods. It was very difficult and I was sweating and there were mosquitoes, kind of like mini vampires.

"Hush, we mustn't awaken the vapid beasts." my dad said as we reached the bottom of a tall and dangerous cliff. The middle of the cliff had a hole. My dad said the vampires thrived within its blackness.

"Look at this," I said, picking up a piece of pink floral underware. I recognized it as belonging to Bella Swams. "Oh no! The vampires have taken her!"

"No, she has gone to them willingly to partake in their orgies of blood and pain. I hope she isn't lost to us yet, otherwise we will have to destroy her too."

"Let's hurry then!" I shouted.... but that was a mistake. A grizzly bear under the control of the vampires awoke to my noise and thundered into the vicinity. Its eyes rolled around in their sockets maddeningly.

"Damn it!" my dad said. He quickly took out a machete and deheaded the bear swiftly. Blood spurted out of the greasy neck and coated the leaves and trees thickly. The bear's brain matter hung from branches. I hoped someday I could move fearlessly like my dad.

"Now... shhh..." my dad said. He put the machete away under his arm in its leather strap. "We must climb. No other way."

I put my heavy pack over a shoulder and prepared to follow my dad... but the grizzly bear had friends. And they were sneaking to us.

My dad stopped and sniffed the air with bulging nostrils. He pulled out his samurie sword and a long chain whip with mental spikes on the end. He whispered, "I sense the smell of blood and filthy things."

Naked men rose out of the bushes cumbersomely. They were stupendously hairy and muscly and had long black dreadlocks with leaves and debris tangled in it, and their thick nails were good for digging and slashing. Their teeth were bigger than normal and very unclean with rotting meat inbetween.. they obviously didn't use floss. Their breaths smelled like rat corpses rotting in excrement-filled sewers. They were wrewolves but in human form! Some of them licked the bear blood off the trees and fought over the brains. Brains were considered a delicacy to them.

The leader Jacob pranced forward and roared like a mindless beast, his green foamy saliva dripping all over. He had whip scars on his back. The vampires must keep the wolves in their control by force and whip them when they are bad.

"Away, you hound of Hades!" my dad threatened, holding the whip in one hand and his sparkling samurie sword in another.

"Rou rrare rrome ro resrraa ra rarrer rin Rewarrd! Ri rannor rarro rou rrou rerro ra rarrerreriree." Jacob growled in werewolf language which translated to: you have come to destroy my master prince Edwerd. I cannot allow you to thwart his majesticity!

Jacob then spread his hairy limbs and flew at my dad's face. My dad held out his sword and it pierced Jacob's stomach cavity and it went through his back. The other werewolves grasped and ran away whimpering. My dad shook Jacob off his sword and wiped the blood off on the grass.

"Let's get up the cliff now before they come back. I have killed their pack leader which should inspire enough fear in them... but they might return." My dad explained logically.

We climbed slowly and quietly but griffins with red eyes attacked us. My dad shot them down with poisoned arrows. I helped him to kill many vampire bats and venemous winged snakes that also flew into our orbit with a duty to kill. At least we creeped to the entrance of the hole. Hopefully our doom was not awaiting inside.


	8. Chapter 8

Scene ELVEN:

My dad took out a flashlight and we both put on night vision goggles. We stepped into the creaky drippy cave. It smelled of blood and rotting corpses in various stages of decay. The ray of the flashlight caught on a pile of dusty human bones. Inside the bones were nested rats. They noticed us and darted forwards with their yellow fangs prepared to strip our flesh off like strips of bacon.

My dad stomped on them with his combat boots, crunching their skulls. The rats left behind bloody splatters, like roadkill.

I tried not o be afraid but then there was an evil shriek and I froze.

"Youuuu!" screamed Renée, a corpse-like vampire bride in a dirty and torn wedding gown. "Death to you!"

"What a pleasant welcome," my dad smirked. He stepped aside and pulled out a grenade from within his pants. He threw it right into the vampire's mouth just as it was flying closer. "Get down, Imelda!"

The grenade exploded into a ball of flames and blood and flesh bits and other nearby stuff. The headless vampire fell over with a lifeless plod. Voices were coming from the distance.

"They are hore mere." My dad said, stepping forward drily. Suddenly we could hear clapping.

"Excellent work, Achilles van Helslug. You have killed another vampire... how many kills does that make now?" Edward said *sarcastically* as he climbed out of the darkness. Behind him were other sneering and sniveling vampires.

"I'm just two short of a thousand. How nice to see you and your despicable clan voluntearing to help me reach one thousand." my dad smiled as he stroked his harpoon.

Edward bared his fangs and looked at me, his eyes bulging prominently wit evilness. "You! You dare to enter our innermost secrecy? You will suffer as I peel the flesh off your bones and feed them to my pet vultures of hell!"

"Don't talk to my daughter like that, you basturd of Satan!" my dad screamed and took out his black rocket launcher. He aimed it at Edward and pulled the trigger. Edward was too fast but the rocket caught one of the vampires behind him in the face. The vampire Elmer exploded instantly. Even the ceiling of the cave was coated and dripping with blood and bits of skin.

"No! My love!" the vampire Roalie shrieked. Her superhuman voice echoed off the cave. My dad and I were forced to our knees. This was the oppurtinity the vampires were waiting for, they attacked us full force, no nonsenses.

I took out a samurie sword like my dad had and slashed wildly, keeping the bountiful creatures away from me. My dad meanwhile was battling Edward with a scimitar and a spiked medeval club that he had been given by an ancient warlock in Moravia.

"Die, you unholy wart on Satan's ass!" my dad shouted as Edward tried to kill him.

"You will never succeed, mwahahaha! No one has ever been able to kill me, I have been around for 700 years!" Edward said dauntingly.

"700 years... it cannot be."

"Yes! Yes! It is, you hardy fool!" Edward raged. "I have seen centuries go by, generations grow strong and then die, dominions rise and wither like dying roses. But I will never die. I am immortal and there is no way you're going to clobber me!"

"Edward isn't even your real name!" my dad screamed as he slashed at Edward's neck but missed. Edward headbutted my dad and the weapons fell out of his hands but he recovered swiftly. He pulled out long solid metal nunchucks from his pants.

"Hahaha, of course it is not. I have had many names over the years! But the most famous identy of mine is Vladimir! Prince of the Drakness!"

"You... I knew it was you. I have seen the medievul paintings by monks who lived in fear of you. I have heard the stories about your cruelty and perversity! I am going to do all I can to end your hideous ways once and for all!"

My dad took out a holy silver cross which made all the vapmires in the cave hiss and bend over meekly. "Imelda! NOW!"

I nodded and slashed the heads off Roalie Lice and Kasper. The heads rolled on the ground sporting blood in all directions while their dying bodies began to writhe in vicious death throws. My dad stepped up to Edward and raised his sparkling mace high, preparing to kill. But then there was a "Noooo! Stop this unworthy massacre!"

"Who is there?" my dad asked the pervading darkness.

"Me, Bella Swans."

Bella Swans crept out from behind a stalacmite. She was naked and bleeding from gashes and wounds everywhere because the vampires had been feasting upon her nimble flesh. her eyes were teary and it was obvious she was possessed by the vampire's spell. She moaned, "You cannot kill Prince Vladmir because... I love him!"

Bladimir snickered, "You sack of uncontainable flesh, you have served your purpose. You have no more blood to give me."

Vladimir waved his hand and Bella's possessed eyes became clear and human. She looked around as if she was just realising where she was. "What is going on? Where am I? Oh my god!"

But... Vladimir had made a fatal flaw. While he was talking to Bella I rushed at him and stabbed him in the back as deeply as pissible.

"Good job, Imedla." my dad said and before Edward got a chance to scream or attack he chopped his head off wit a heavy battle axe that he'd kept strapped on his back. Black blood seeped out of Edward's body and mixed with the dust on the floor of the cave. At last... the Prince of the Drakness was dead, it was too good to believe. I felt so happy! I wanted to laugh, but I knew we were not done yet.

"Where am I?" Bella asked as she stumbled around in the dark.

"Imelda, go help the girl, and I shall prepare the bonfire." my dad said as he began to pile the vampire corpses on top of one another like a piramid.

I grabbed Bella by the arm and pulled her to safety. I gave her my jacket which was big enough to cover her whole body. Meanwhile, my dad poured gasoline and holy water and garlic over the bodies of the dead creatures. He pulled out a flamethrower.

"And with this holy fire, I send thee to your proper place in the fiery bowls of Hell. Forever. Amen." my dad prayed. He pressed the ignition button and flames streamed out onto the bodies which instantly incinerated (Vampires are highly flameable).


	9. Chapter 9

Scene TWELVE:

"Quickly we must leave here!" my dad shouted as the fire died down and the vampire's bodies were nothing but satanic black dust.

We climbed down the cliff as fast as we could, trekked to the car and drove to dreary Forks. We took Bella to her house. Her parents were wondering where she had gone.

"Oh my god, Bella! Where are your clothes?" Her mother Esme shrieked, writhing, and tearing at her glistening silver hair.

"Don't worry, it will be ok. She is fine now." my dad said. "But you should call a doctor to see her, she may need some sticks."

"Yes, you are right," Esme said and bustled to the phone on the countertop. Minutes later Dr. Cullen arrived. He had a big black bag full of medical instrupments and he sat down beside Bella who was on the couch. He inspected her wounds with a magnifying glass.

"What happened?" the dr. asked, taking off his monocle.

"I dunno... I was walking in the woods and I got lost and fell a couple times." Bella said.

Dr. Cullen looked curiously at her. "Really? I don't believe that, forgive me. These wounds are severe."

"Bella always gets into accidents. She had weak cordinations." Randy Jackson explained statistically.

Dr. Cullen stood up frowning and patted down his waistcoat. "Tell me the truth! Otherwise I cannot heal this young lady!"

"That is the truth." my dad said sternly. Vampires were supposed to stay secret from people. We had given Bella a flask of memory-eraser before we took her home. She didn't remember anything about the vampires.

"No, it is not. These wounds... and you, who are you anyways?" dr. Cullen demanded of my dad. The doctor snarkled and that is when we saw his fangs. The doctor was a vAPMIRE!

Esme shrieked as my dad jumped the couch and faced dr. Dullen.

"You are the last vampire here! I knew it! I smelled there was one more of you filthy smelly basturds!" my dad declared wisely.

Dr. Cullen hissed and grabbed me as a hostage. "Stay back or I will pop your daughter's head off!"

My dad hesitated.

"What have you done with the rest of my clan?" demanded the evil vampire. "Where is Prince Vladimir, and Roalie Lice, and Kasper, and Elmer?"

"THEY ARE DEAD, YOU WASTED FIEND!" my dad said as he grabbed a cockscrew off the coffee table and stabbed the vampire in the throat repeatedly till it fell over writhingly.

"Call the police" Randy shouted at Esme.

"No, stop them from calling, Imelda!" my dad shouted as he stabbed the vampie in the heart with a secret dagger in his pants, killing it until it was dead.

I stopped Bella's wavering parents and locked them in the broom closet till dr. Cullen's corpse was burned to satanic ashes in the backyard. Then my dad forced mr and mrs Swans to drink from the flask of forgetfulness so they wouldn't remember what happened. Then we said goodbye to Bella Swans (she drank again too) and we left to the hotel. We packed up quickly and quietly and traveled to the airport and... back to our macabre welcoming mansion in Transylvania! My dad received a big plaque and lots of money for his 1000 vampire skills and I was made a real hunter because I helped to kill the evil prince Vladimir and I killed some of the others in the clan.

Washingtion was finally resting in peace... but the world still had lots of problems.

But that was ok, because me and my dad were around to thwart vileness!

The end.


End file.
